SELF HELP RESOURCE - Parenting / General


Parenting today is more challenging than ever with both partners working. So, unless a woman is physically and emotionally prepared with sufficient support, news of a pregnancy could lead to a lot of mixed emotions. Here are some ways to deal with these feelings:

Take time out
You may very likely be feeling overwhelmed by the changes that will take place in your life due to the pregnancy. Take a deep breath and think about it with as much calm as you can muster. Collect your thoughts and think about all your options before deciding on a course of action. It would be important to discuss it with your spouse, family or with trusted friends.

Don't go on a guilt trip
Many women go through feelings of anger and frustration about their pregnancy. There may be a tendency to berate yourself and wallow in guilt. But this will only succeed in making the situation worse. Write down all your fears on a piece of paper. Fears always lose their potency when they are articulated.

Engage with your partner
Even if you are angry with your partner for his inability to completely empathize with you, reach out to him when you feel more in control of your emotions. Talk to him about all your fears and concerns, because unless you are honest with him, he might not understand what you are going through. He may not agree with you on all points but at least you would have created room for a healthy discussion without recriminations.

Acknowledge your feelings
It is important not to dismiss any feelings that you may have. Do acknowledge each of your conflicting emotions without judgment. Find someone you can trust and who you think will understand your feelings and share it with them. If this does not work, then definitely see a trained therapist who will provide a safe and non-judgmental space for you to process your feelings.

Talk to other expecting moms
It may help to reach out to other expecting mothers who share similar feelings. You may find support groups on social media or on certain pregnancy related websites. Just knowing that you are not alone will make you feel better and more accepting of your own feelings.

Career concerns
You could be having very realistic fears about how pregnancy will impact your career prospects. For instance, you may be on the verge of a promotion that involves a lot of travel, and pregnancy is not exactly what you want in your life right now. It is a tough choice especially if you are doing very well at work. Work through your concerns and discuss them with your partner so that he also understands what you are going through. You know best as to what would work for you. Just acknowledging to yourself that you are having these conflicting emotions will help you think with more clarity. Just trust yourself.

Try relaxation techniques
Using meditation, deep breathing, guided imagery or other relaxation techniques will help you put your life in perspective. When your body and mind are completely relaxed, you are more likely to deal with your issues in an appropriate manner and make the right decisions for you and your baby.

Sometimes it can happen that one may not be exactly thrilled with their pregnancy and might also actually hate it. It may seem inappropriate to be angry with your pregnancy, the world in general and specifically your partner, but you may at times be likely to feel all this and more. Try not to repress your emotions, share them with a trusted person and don't ever think that just because right now you hate the fact that you are pregnant, it will automatically make you a bad mom. You might just take to motherhood like a duck to water!


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